Well, she’s adorable.

New dog, who dis?

Yep, that’s our daughter’s very dark brindle Bullmastiff puppy. We’ve had her a week and a half now, and we’ve been reminded of all the puppy things we’d forgotten from our English Mastiff… like the crazy sharp chompers they use on you when you least expect it, and they way they pee on everything and poop in places that you’ll step in. And how much work they are, taking outside, feeding, watering, playing, avoiding stepping on, etc.

It’s like having a hairy, rabid human baby in the house.

But man, she’s cute ain’t she?

And so far, she is holding her own with our other giant baby. (I keep trying to get a better picture of them tug of warring, but they move so much!)

Don’t you just want to pet her and smell her puppy breath? (Wife says it smells like chicken salad…)

***

Anyways. On to some Book Info/Author Things.

West of Prehistoric, well, I just got my royalty statement from Oct-Dec 2020 a few days ago. I sold 409 copies, between electronic and print, in three months. That’s amazing. I am utterly blown away by it. I was -hoping- to have moved 300 copies by now, I had no idea that we’d smoked that number back in December. For a brand new rookie author, that is a fantastic start to a new career. Thank you to everyone who bought a copy or read it on kindle unlimited or who supported me by not telling me to get lost when I posted about the book somewhere. I owe you all. And the only way I can repay that debt is to keep writing and try really hard to not write poorly.

The Goodreads Giveaway seems to be going well, over 500+ people are interested in getting a free copy. Hopefully that will translate into some sales.

I started a BookBub Ad which will begin to run tomorrow. That’s a new thing for me, so I’m curious to see how that works out.

I’m also planning on a BookBub Deal, which is a bigger deal than an ad… and a good bit more expensive. But I’m going to hold off on that until the sequel is out.

East of Prehistoric is getting edited and such now. I’m ready to get that sucker back, polished up, and off to print.

North of Prehistoric… the writing continues. I’m excited with where the 3rd book will lead the story and characters.

South of Prehistoric… the notes and general plot continue to grow.

Be a man.

Hunt something. Kill it, cook its flesh, and eat it with your bare hands. Your ancestors would be proud.

Go to a hardware store and pick up an axe or a hammer, you feel that? It’s your inner man calling for you to create something out of nothing.

Be firm and confident in your masculinity, it ain’t toxic. It’s natural. It is who you are. Your chromosomal makeup dictates it.

Work hard. Provide for your family. Take pride in that. Your sweat, your energy, your time, your patience, your struggle – don’t do it for nothing. Know your worth.

In a world of fatherless households, be a father. Teach your kids right and wrong, and how to be better than you.

Own and carry a gun. And never relinquish it to anyone who holds power over you. With it, you are a free man, without it, you are a subject and at the mercy of others.

Stand up for what is right. Even when it’s unpopular and you stand alone. Even when it comes with great cost and consequence. Stand firm on your convictions.

Treat your woman with respect. They are your equal and at times, your better. Neither of you are anything without the other. And you get out of a relationship what you put into it.

Never be silenced. You have a voice. You have power. Use it.

Have honor. It defines you. Let your word be your bond, and never break it.

Don’t be afraid to ask for or give help. We are not alone in this fallen world.

Praise God in everything you do, and trust God in everything that seemingly stands in your way. Nothing in this life matters as much as your Salvation and relationship with the true King of kings.

Embrace who you are. Be a man amongst men.

Signed Book Giveaway!

In my quest to surpass 50 Amazon reviews, I’m offering 10 print copies, signed by me, through Goodreads.

I’m currently at 47, with an awesome average of 4.8. For some reason, I’m fairing less on Goodreads, with 25 reviews and a 4.60 rating.

But I digress.

FREE BOOKS. Signed!

And since I’m still a newbie author without a following, the chances of you snatching one up is pretty good.

But I’d still prefer if you entered the giveaway, then spread the word to your friends, family, optometrist, or fellow devoted shooter. Tell them the book doesn’t suck and that they’ll enjoy it. So far, except for those two people who gave me 3 stars, everyone has.

See below for more information!

Goodreads Book Giveaway

West Of Prehistoric by Erik Testerman

West Of Prehistoric

by Erik Testerman

Giveaway ends May 03, 2021.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads. Enter Giveaway

March 2021 Update Post

Other than the contract being signed on my sequel to the ‘Internationally Reviewed and Loved’ West of Prehistoric, it’s been a fairly uneventful month so far in personal terms.

The only notable exception is that we decided to add another dog to our family. This one is a brindle Bull Mastiff as a surprise gift for my Daughter’s birthday. (Every Princess needs a ferocious slobbery guard dog.)

We pick her up Easter weekend, so expect more pictures to follow next month.

But these are the latest pictures of her, sent from the breeders.

She’s adorable, and the runt of the litter so we are hoping she’ll stay around 100 pounds when fully grown. I know that sounds like a big dog, but our Bear, a English Mastiff, is 180 pounds. So to us, it SEEMS like we are getting a moderate sized dog.

The Wife and I have settled on the name ‘Honey’, because it goes with ‘Bear’ and if we leave it up to our soon to be five year old daughter, it’d be either Glitter Heart or Flower Petal. And I’m not even joking, those are the two names she has picked out when she told us she wanted a pug.

Yes, our daughter wanted a Pug… but we are getting her a Bull Mastiff instead… (Which was her third choice, I think Poodle was her second choice…)

I stole the below picture from Pinterest, but it shows how Pugs and Bull Mastiffs are -kind- of the same… Got the same mushed face at least.

I looked for a pug, honest. The closest puppies I found were outside of Pittsburg, which is over a 7 hour drive for us and that ain’t happening. I told the breeders they needed to jack up their prices since they had the only pug puppies on the entire East Coast.

And it’s kind of fascinating how breeds ebb and flow in popularity. I found a ton of English Mastiff puppies, about an equal number of Labradoodles, and a bunch of pit bull puppies. Scattered in that were other breeds, but I saw only one ad for Labradors. Which is odd, given how popular of a breed they are. And only one ad for Bull Mastiffs, of which only one puppy remained when I contacted them.

So, kind of weird.

In other news, my lovely Wife is about to turn 40. And she still looks super amazing and hot. And I’m so incredibly lucky to have her. She’s gonna be a really hot grandma one day.

This is my phones wallpaper of her, a picture I snuck while she was getting ready for us to go out to eat at the beach.

The whole COVID thing makes enjoying her 40th kind of a pain. Instead of doing a YUGE party like she deserves, we’re gonna be low key instead… by taking her out to eat at her favorite Mexican restaurant. (Who doesn’t even do the embarrassing birthday singing and sombrero anymore!)

And I got her a bunch of ‘Happy 21st Birthday’ plates, cups, tiara, sash, etc so she doesn’t feel so bad about hitting the big Four Oh.

Hope everyone had a fantastic March. Spring is here, let’s ride into it with loving arms, open hearts, and smoking gun barrels.

My Sequel, East of Prehistoric, is green-lit.

“Hither came Jedidiah Huckleberry Smith, the Outlaw, black-haired, sullen-eyed, dual Colt Peacemakers in hand, a cowboy, a revenger, an apeslayer, with gigantic justices and gigantic amusement, to tread the forbidden lands of a lost world underneath his booted feet.” – Robert E Howard, paraphrased from Conan The Barbarian.

Yes, that’s right. Jedidiah Huckleberry Smith is back! The contract has been signed and returned. Woop, woop!

I’m pretty danged excited.

The first book, West of Prehistoric, seems to have been a pretty big hit for a newbie author. I’m sitting at 4.8/5 on Amazon with 44 reviews, and 4.7/5 on Goodreads with 19 reviews. That’s spectacular feedback.

I REALLY hope to replicate that with the sequel as I expand on the lost world I’ve created and the characters that are in it.

As I’ve said before, I think, I plan on four books in this series. West, East, North, and then South. I’ve even managed to make the directional titles work within the books. “First book takes place in the West, second book takes place to the East inside of the Lost World, and so on…”

And I’m really excited as I work on the third one. I’m elevating a couple secondary characters from the first book to main characters, and that’s gonna make things fun. Also, introducing another lost world civilizations is gonna be awesome. I can’t say much more than that without giving away anything. It’s gonna be fantastic. More characters, more revenge, more adventure, more love, more excitement!

So, East of Prehistoric should be out by June. And I’m hoping, if I bust my rear end, that I can get the third book, North of Prehistoric, out by December. That’s a pretty good goal I think.

So far, the fourth book, South of Prehistoric, exists only in a few pages of notes of awesome stuff that needs to happen. And the follow up series that takes place 25-30 years later exists only in my head. But I plan on taking a break and writing some other stuff before I work on the second series for this lost world.

Oh yes, and here is the art that is going into the inside cover of the Sequel. A huge thank you to Adam Mathison-Sward for putting this together for me.

And of course, here is the planned Back Cover script for East of Prehistoric:

After retiring from outlawing, Jedidiah Huckleberry Smith just wanted to be left alone in Wyoming with his guns and regrets.

But then he discovered an entrance to a lost world, a place full of grand adventure, as well as spectacular dangers from both prehistoric dinosaurs and a race of savage apes intent on conquest.

Now, a new fort has been established on the other side, and a strange civilization of humans and dinosaurs have been located. The people are descendants from another time, long trapped in prehistory, and with them a fragile alliance is created.

But will it be enough as Jed faces vengeance from enemies both new and old?

Will his savagery and cunning keep him and his love alive?

Or will they die, on a mountain of fired brass, amidst the guttural bellows of barbaric apes and roars of monstrous dinosaurs?

Jed doesn’t know, but he’s always willing to shoot first and figure out the rest afterwards.