The Swan Lake Ballet, deliciousness, and pointy things stabbed into bad guys.

Went to the Ballet this weekend in Asheville, it was lots of fun.

We don’t get to dress up often, because we’re Baptists and can get by with jeans in church :), so we took advantage of the opportunity and the ladies got new dresses and we men… well… we wore whatever we could scrounge up. This is our third year we’ve tried going to the ballet, so it’s become something of a tradition now.

As for the ballet itself, it was long. But the second half was a good bit more exciting than the first, and the black swan dance was pretty badass. And near us sat a bunch of girls who were obviously ballerinas, so whenever they started clapping like crazy I knew some awesome and difficult move had just happened.

Also, right next door to us was a heavy metal concert featuring Slayer. So there were all sorts of folks milling around outside before and after the ballet with mohawks and openly smoking pot. Some guys from work went to it, but I didn’t see anyone I knew. And obviously, I’m to classy for such loud screaming and head banging to peek in and see if I recognized anyone.

We also ate at Tupelo Honeys before hand… Where I had the most amazing meal ever. I’m not one to EVER take a picture of my food before I eat it, so the fact that I did shows how impressed I was. I had the Shoo Mercy Sweet Potato Pancakes, and they rocked my mouth like Slayer rocked next door. (That’s a giant slab of fried chicken, on top of the bacon, on top of the pancakes…) Mmm. I want to go back.

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Also, I watched an episode of Gotham where my pocket knife showed up stabbed into a dead bad guy. See below –

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That’s an Applegate-Fairbairn folder, based off the Applegate-Fairbairn fighting knife made famous in the post WWII era book ‘Kill or Get Killed’. Kinda cool, I’ve carried a ‘Covert Folder’ version for 11 years now, and never run into anyone else with one.

 

I ate four species of animals in a slaughterhouse of flavor last night.

These Brazilian Steakhouses know how to make a man happy.

It was date night. So I took the lovely wife and we destroyed that place. We ate so much meat we were worried they were going to ask us to leave. (My wife is a wonderful carnivore like me.)

meathouse

The wife had a $9 glass of wine, that came from a $14 bottle. Stuff like that always proves just how fancy a place is, when even the cheap stuff ain’t cheap!

But if you really, and I mean really, like meat. You’ve got to go. They walk over to your table with giant slabs of 20 different sorts of meats on giant skewers and cut off chunks of tasty animal flesh that has been marinated and cooked into perfection.

They also have a ginormous salad bar, but why waste stomach space on such inferior food?

But look at this. This is the stuff dreams are made of.

brazilliansteakhouse

And we chose the perfect day to go. Because it was the final day of VEGAN FEST 2018!  It was right across the street from us. I was half expecting protestors to throw fake buckets of blood at me and call me a murderer once I walked out. But I guess PETA wasn’t there, because everyone seemed really nice.

This is from their website:

Join us for a celebration of compassionate living in one of the top vegan-friendly cities in the country: Asheville, NC! It’s the fourth annual Asheville VeganFest: June 8, 9, and 10, 2018. On Friday and Saturday, listen to speakers from around the country as they tackle the latest vegan issues in our new venue, The Orange Peel. On Sunday, enjoy an outdoor festival with over 75 vendors showcasing vegan food, beer, lifestyle products and more!

(Sorry guys, there wasn’t any compassion inside the steak house. It was like a massacre of meat.)

Asheville VeganFest is hosted by the largest no-kill animal rescue organization in North Carolina, Brother Wolf Animal Rescue. As we continue to expand our circle of compassion, we’re spreading the love with our community and introducing folks to the joy of delicious, healthy, plant-based foods. Join us for what is quickly growing to be the largest vegan festival in the Southeast

Well, a lot of animals died for me to eat yesterday. Like, a lot.

I ate four different species, not counting the smoked salmon that I got before I realized ‘smoked’ doesn’t really mean ‘cooked’. Ick.

But those poor vegans really don’t know what they are missing out on.

I bet every time the wind changed direction and blew the wondrous scents of beef sirloin, flank steak, ribs, fillet mignon, beef tenderloin, pork sausage, lamb chops and leg o’ lamb, and roasted cinnamon pineapple towards them – a handful converted to meat eaters on the spot and zombie walked to the nearest fast food restaurant for some greasy burgers.

Interestingly enough, apparently vegans don’t like paying for parking. The streets were packed, there were zero parking spots, anywhere. Until we went into the parking deck that was 500 feet from the festival. After the first deck, it was pretty much empty the rest of the way up.

Over all, a good tasty adventure I highly recommend.

And just to throw some politics into this mix.

Last night was the Tony Awards, which celebrates theater or something. I dunno. I don’t much care. Watching a bunch of self righteous creepoids patting themselves on the back in $5,000 gowns and tuxedos and lecture us ‘commoners’ on how we are a bunch of unenlightened troglodytes for having opposing political views is at the very bottom of ‘Things I Don’t Give a Whoop About’.

But, apparently, Robert DeNiro accepted some award then received a standing ovation for yelling ‘F Trump’ as his acceptance speech.

Ooo. So BRAVE and POWERFUL.

yawn

Let’s look at some really basic logic.

Trumps booming economy with a record low unemployment rate vs DeNiro’s continuously unhinged insults?

Yep. Have fun storming the castle.