Once upon a time we hunted Mammoths…

Once upon a time “manliness” was measured by trophies. Whether it was saber tooth fangs, bear claws, pelts, sports trophies, or war medals. It was how many pieces of precious stones or metals one could afford. It was cheered for in the Colosseum. You couldn’t see a Crusader or Native American without them showing some form of loot, be it pagan gold, a weapon,  or scalp taken from a defeated foe. Even the Samurai wore intricate armors and used masterfully crafted weapons to distinguish their greatness. 

Every nation, every country, every culture had a measure of manliness that others could see, measure, and respect.

What happened?

Because now tens of thousands of men tweet about how oppressed they are, how their feelings are hurt, or how society has done them wrong.

What a bunch of whiny little babies.

It’s as if thousands of beta-males/females are playing “Woe Is Me”, and whoever can play the biggest, or most, victim cards wins. Everyone is ‘one-upping’ each other over stupidity.

And if you were dealt the ‘worst hand’ of the game, which is apparently, being born a white male… you’ve got to grovel into the ground about how you are the worst of the worst. Then you’ve got to seek out forgiveness for existing. (You people are the most pathetic of the entire bunch.)

I’m a white male, and I make no apologizes for my genetic make-up because I didn’t choose it. I also make no apologizes for whatever my ancestors may or may not have done. (And being Vikings they probably did some bad shit at some point.) Because guess what? They did it. Not me.

Personally – The only thing I plunder and ravage are those Brazilian Steak Houses. (I ate four species of animals in a slaughterhouse of flavor last night.) I’m sorry I ate all your delicious meats and only left the cinnamon tainted bananas for the other guests.

But honestly – If anything, I ought to thank my ancestors. Because if it hadn’t been for them, I wouldn’t be here.

Think about it.

We’re all the result of survivors. Maybe not victors, but survivors. Maybe not descended from noble blue blooded lines of men who charged fields as Knights or Kings or what have you… maybe our ancestors were the guys who crawled over the battlefield slitting wounded throats and stealing boots… who knows?

But they were survivors. And considering that most of world history is full of tyranny, misery, filth, suffering, oppression, and folks barely eeking out a meager existence – that counts for something. They went through the real ringer. They experienced REAL hardships. I’m not talking about someone giving you a dirty look on a bus or cat calling after you as you walk down the street.  Or about how Trump’s words on Twitter hurt you.

But REAL misery and suffering. Real hardships. The kind that made the life expectancy  in the low 30’s IF you were wealthy. The kind of life where warfare, strife, rape, death, disease, famine, and plague were every day expectations or concerns.

Now you bitch when your latte doesn’t have the right amount of soy milk in it. Or about how the ‘white male patriarchy’ is keeping you down. Or how no one is supporting your transgender lifestyle.

Stop wasting your ancestors sacrifice and struggles to whine about how your thin skin feelings have been deeply wounded by mere looks, words, or thoughts. It’s unbecoming.

If you live in America, you’ve got it better than 99.9999999999% of the entire human race that has ever existed. And you’re wasting that golden, uber-rare opportunity, by whining about everything and everyone instead of thriving.

Suck it up buttercup. No one owes you shit. No one is stopping you from doing whatever it is you want. (Unless it’s mass murder, than it’s “Hello Mr. Glock.” Pew Pew!)

If you can’t make it in America today, you never would have made it anywhere in the world at any previous point in time.

P.S. I didn’t get drawn to hunt a Maine Moose this year. Sad face. It’s my second attempt, so I’m starting to wrack up some ‘extra points’ to carry over each year I apply. The only reason I mention this is because, A. I just thought of it and checked. B. You don’t have to be a hunter to be an Alpha, but there’s nothing wrong with washing animal blood off your hands once in a while and collecting ritualistic trophies.

I also put in for a bison and a big horn ram in Wyoming Super Raffle. (Because my  Painted Desert Ram needs company.) Chances of getting drawn are about as good as being smacked in the groin by a meteor, but it’s relatively inexpensive to play. I think $20 to pick two animals. So I entered myself and my dad. I think he picked a bison and an elk… maybe? The drawing is at the end of the month. I’m pretty sure my odds are between nope and nada.

P.P.S. I feel like now is a great time to plug an old post I did called No, Women aren’t equal to Men. That one got pretty popular.

An excerpt:

Did you know in ancient Sparta, the only Spartans who were allowed markers on their graves were men who fell in battle or women who died in child birth?

They held giving birth on the same level as dying in battle. The equality of the creation of life and the taking of life.

If something about that isn’t romantically poetic – I don’t know poetry. (I don’t know poetry)

There’s a joke that goes like this: What’s worse to go through – child birth or a kick to the groin? Answer – Kick to the groin, because a woman will think about having another child but no man will consider another kick.

Women will go through 9 months of misery followed by hours of intense suffering, all to bring an innocent little life into this world. During this time, men will fetch them oddities for their cravings and try to make them comfortable enough to avoid their justifiable wrath at what we’ve done to them.

That’s pretty awesome. We should celebrate the heck out of what you go through. This is further proof of your superiority.

But modern feminism, has taken this push for ‘equality’ to far.

Anyways. Here’s a link.

No, Women aren’t equal to Men.

Painted Desert Ram mount is back.

Since I beat all the dead deer from rifle season to the Taxidermist last year, it only took six months to have the mount finished.  It’s beautiful. The man is exceptionally talented and did such a gorgeous animal justice. I’m very, very pleased.

Best of all, there was enough hide left over that I’m going to make a loin cloth for when we host garden parties. Yipeee!

Also my son named it Boris. I don’t know why, but the name has stuck. (I miss being a kid, nothing had to make sense back then.)

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If you haven’t read my write-up about hunting on an exotic game ranch, it’s worthwhile. When our Pronghorn trip was canceled last minute due to… well… Wyoming being Wyoming and having a massive ice storm hit it in October… (which sucks when your insanely expensive out of state tags are non-refundable.) I tried to find reviews of exotic game ranches and couldn’t locate any. So, I wrote my own afterwards.

A review of Caryonah Game Ranch

It was a great experience, and thankfully nothing like I’d envisioned. I’m sure there are game ranches that are terrible, I’ve seen YouTube videos of some, but this one was fantastic. I’d certainly go back again with the lovely wife, as she wants to kill a boar.

As for writing… 

The sequel to West of Prehistoric is well under way. Initial rough draft is almost finished, I’m 22,000 words into it. So far, it’s much, much easier to write a sequel after the ‘hard work’ of creating the world, characters, critters in the first one. I’m just building off something that already exists now.

Since I managed to work in a lot of small and large over-reaching story/character arches into the first book, I’ve a ton of material to play with, tease, and reveal.

 

Pew Pew Pew. Nom Nom Nom!

wyominghunt

This fall, I’m going to drive 26 hours to Wyoming, to hunt the second fastest land animal on the planet. Then I’m going to eat it, mount its head on my wall, and make my wife a cave-woman bikini out of the hide.

Like this:

cavewoman

By the way, Non-Resident Tag prices suck out west. But not in NC. Here it’s like, “Oh, you are from Planet Mars, sure, here’s some extra deer tags to go with your fishing license. That’ll be $15 please. Oh, you want a Bear Stamp too? That’ll be a nickel.” (Kidding, slightly)

Lots of planning involved in this trip.

But the hardest part of planning this hunt… is what gun to use.

Ruger Gunsite Scout, which has quickly become one of my favorite guns. Or a DS Arms FAL.. both in .308.

Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Since I’m going for a buck and a doe, I guess I should just take both…

I’m stoked to go back to Wyoming. It’s been 11 years since I was there last. I spent a week with my old man touring the state and thinking about moving there to be a Peace Officer.

It’s like the promised land. Full of conservatives, freedom, more guns than gas stations, and more antelope and mule deer than people. Plus lots of buffalo and elk and bighorn sheep and grizzlies and oh my!

And the liberals are contained in Jackson Hole for the most part. (Although I hear they are spreading into surrounding areas as they flee the ‘liberal utopias’ of California…)

The only downside? Harsh winters and no sweet tea.

This was from my last trip. I don’t know recall where, but there was this awesome moose just hanging out in a field. Almost like it was a statue or something…

wyomingmoose

Edit – It’s fitting that the day I post this, this study is in the news.

Women Prefer Men Who Eat Meat

“Women — even vegetarian women — rated meat-loving men much higher.”

Hehehe.

Once again, this just proves that women prefer real men over soy-boy’s, in their momma’s basement, wearing flannel pajamas, and talking about FEELINGS and feminism.

I love Elephants – But we need to slay them, eat their flesh, and wear their skins!

Disclaimer – I both love Animals and I support Hunting.

If I was on the Ark, I’d never let them off.

I say that, then think about how much our English Mastiff annoys me… so after 2 days of being cooped up with them I’d probably make them all walk the plank and into the ocean.  Two by two. (Not enough is said about Noah’s patience.)

But I support hunting. I wish I had the time, energy, and ability to do a lot more of it.  Maybe when I get to move to Wyoming…  And personally, I don’t care for the sitting and waiting, and bonding with nature and reverting to your primitive self stuff… I find that boring. But I like the POW-THUD! Part. And meat, I love tasty, tender morsels of flesh.

But here we are – Elephants!

Trump to lift ban on importing elephant trophies from Africa

And the US of A goes collectively nuts. The left complains because they complain about EVERYTHING, and because their hero Obama put the ban in place. The right complains because hunting isn’t as popular, understood, or accepted as it used/should be.

Everyone seems to agree that it’s just so SAD to allow them to be killed!

But tell that to the African’s who have eleven-foot-tall, 13,000-pound animals for neighbors. And not just one or two, but HERDS of them.  Who will stomp your fences, ruin your crops, poop in your yards, and occasionally go on rampages that destroy houses and cars and kill you, your family, or your neighbors.

So what’s worse?

That?

Or putting upwards of $50,000 into an impoverished economy, humanely and quickly killing a troublesome elephant, giving literally thousands of pounds of meat to the starving locals, and getting a hunt of a lifetime, some pictures, and maybe a pair of ivory tusks to hang on your wall?

Easy answer.

But you know what else all that evil, rich, white hunter money goes towards?

Anti-Poaching teams and land/game conservation efforts.

Take that away and see how well these dirt poor countries do at keeping their animals alive. Starving people don’t give a crap how rare an animal is, they’ll eat it as fast as they can kill it. HUGE swaths of Africa are nothing but wasteland because there has been no conservation efforts. But most countries understand the VALUE of leaving them alone for hunters to come pour money into their economy and food on their table.

An elephant getting killed is cause for celebration to local villages. They pour out by the hundreds to start hacking off slabs of meat. Nothing goes to waste.

Now here’s where people say, “But they are magnificent creatures!” (Yes. Yes they are!)

They are intelligent, clever, with a family like social structure, and they even mourn their dead!

Just like Pitbulls right? And they are out right banned, and sometimes confiscated from their owners and killed for simply existing in many cities across America because of the ‘threat’ they pose.  And dogs are family members.

They are attractive, intelligent, and social animals, just like Elephants. Except they are loyal and protective.

Mr. Elephant don’t care about you.

So what’s your point?

“They are RARE! Right?” Sure, more rare than the most common breed of dog in America, that so many people automatically hate because of a bunch of crappy owners raising crappy dogs and getting plastered all over the news? Rhetorical Question!

Yes and no, but that’s where conservation comes in.

And believe it or not, conservation is not ‘sit back and let the animals do what they want and never get involved’. Conservation is taking the responsibility of carefully cultivating a species to maintain a healthy population.  This means culling. Selectively choosing a certain portion of a herd and removing them to keep the herd healthy.

Quick fact. In the 1950’s Turkeys in North Carolina numbered around 2,000. Through hunting/conservation efforts – By 2015 there are around 250,000 turkeys and hunters were taking out around 30,000 of them a year.

I don’t want to get to heavy into this. But if you allow a herd of deer to reproduce without culling, you’re going to have over-populated area problems. Starvation, disease, car accidents, and predators moving into the area. (Coyotes don’t care what’s on the end of your leash, be it Poodle or Kid. Food is food.) And at the rate of two Bambi’s per Doe a year, they reproduce FAST.

If you think it’s sad for hunters to humanely shoot deer and eat the meat or mount the rack on their wall, think how sad it is for hundreds of deer to slowly starve to death or die of disease?

Or maybe you should youtube predators in action. Trust me, nature is no where near as humane as the treasured ‘one shot drop’. Watch some poor cute animal get ham stringed, then ripped apart and eaten while it’s still alive and tell me we are somehow worse than nature taking it’s course.

Coming back to Elephants, it’s the same thing. There may be less of them, but they need to be properly managed by HUNTERS and CONSERVATIONISTS. They don’t need a bunch of people hollering that every single elephant is precious and should be allowed to live!

They need to be treated like a protected and treasured resource.

If an area can’t support a population, they MUST be culled until it can. And most African countries get this, that’s why they have permits and put resources in place. Other African countries, like Zimbabwe, is an empty field of silent death where nothing sings or moves because the natives killed and ate everything they could find.

This is the jist of the argument:

Basic Americans – “Don’t hurt them!”

Basic Africans – “Kill them! Kill them all!”

African Governments – “Here, go kill whats needed and give us tons of monies.  And Stop Poachers! Because they are screwing our balancing up!”

And please don’t bring up the whole ‘evil hunter’ thing that just pumps bullet after bullet into critters. It shows ignorance.We are not poachers spraying Elephants with full-auto AK-47’s and RPKs.

First off, because we can’t buy full-auto guns like that. (Write your congress critter – cause we’d like to!)

Second – No one likes to have to track a wounded animal. It takes time and effort and it sucks. You may not find it, you may have to wander around in the woods all night with a flash light. That REALLY sucks for a hunter. One shot drops are where it’s at and what we all hope for. Be it bunny, deer, or Snuffaluffagus. But if need be, we will hurl another bullet into them as fast as possible if the first didn’t finish them off.

Elephants, Lions, Tigers, Bears, and Oh-My’s are no different. Except those critters may very well kill you if you don’t kill it quick enough.

And probably Snuffy too. Don’t let his Sesame Street behavior fool you.

Personally, I don’t have much interest in shooting an Elephant. Not my thing. I hear Cape Buffalo are a real dangerous thrill and that Hippo’s are not the giant peaceful cows people think they are.  But I’d love to wax a Rhino. Won’t happen in my lifetime, but with good conservation and poacher-prevention, and a big inheritance, maybe they will be plentiful enough that my descendants can kill one for me.

Also – Sat is opening rifle day, so I’m going hunting for many deers. Wish me luck.

 

 

EDIT – After writing this, this link was shown to me.  A quick and worthy read.

https://www.thehighroad.org/index.php?threads/interesting-facts-on-african-hunting-just-what-peta-doesnt-want-you-to-hear.189864/

To sum up, countries that ban hunting had severe Elephant herd declines due to poaching where-as countries that allowed hunting and promoted conservation saw Elephant herds INCREASE.

 

 

On the writing side of things, I discovered SCRIVENER a couple days ago. And actually made myself motion-sick last night by scrolling, cutting, pasting, scrolling, repeating, over almost 80,000 words last night into the program. But it’s supposed to be awesome, right now it’s just kind of confusing. But being able to bounce easily between chapters instead of searching a YUGE 170ish page Word document for the part I need to edit or left off at, is nice.

 

If you like this, if it entertains you, feel free to subscribe to the email notification to the right of the screen.  No one will have to know you feel the same way as me. You can be discrete. Or feel free to share it to your friends and family, and even those of the opposite political persuasion who may be offended. Heck – SIGN THEM UP! (Christmas is coming up – What a gift of joy!) Bwhahahaha…. 🙂 BTW – From here on out, I plan on posting roughly ONCE a week, unless it’s something important. Because I don’t like spamming people and typing takes time better spent writing a book for money.